I often wonder how relationships have changed over time. How the expectations that you hold in these relationships have transformed. How the values that were once deemed sacrosanct have been diluted in this day and age.
What do you actually base a relationship on these days? It really can’t be on trust, because earning someone’s trust requires considerable effort and time. And in today’s generation where people are chasing quick fixes, who has the time or the energy to put in those efforts?
It can’t be based on honesty either. Take for example the photographs that we upload on our social media. Heavily filtered content that are but snippets showing our best self. Aren’t they but half truths? Isn’t there another side to our story; The one we conveniently hide from public view? It does come across to me as though we’re being less than honest. How can we expect to base your relationship on honesty when this “less than honest” inclination has become our character trait?
For the longest time, I believed that I could base the relationship on unconditional love. Turns out, unconditional love is a myth and love inevitably fades in a relationship, to be replaced merely by “familiarity”, “convenience”, “the reluctance to start afresh” and perhaps even the “fear of ending up alone”. Sadly, these emotions do not have enough fire in their bellies to sustain a relationship.
I suppose then, that the only thing that we can base a relationship on today is friendship; hoping that when all else fails, we’ll at least see that friend when we look at each other. But I fear even this may be at risk, with the ascendance of friendships formed only with the intention of reaping the “benefits”. Perhaps these casual friendships have diluted the essence of what a “friendship” used to mean.
Perhaps after enough water has run under the bridge, we’ll realise what we’ve lost in our pursuit of instant gratification. Perhaps we’ll convince the next generation that it’s better to walk than to fly. Perhaps the Earth will slow down, and help us understand that time is not the enemy – it’s our fear of losing out. And perhaps as the Earth slows down, we’ll understand that time has never been the enemy; That the real enemy is our fear of missing out.